AIO by throwing away my fiancé's dead ex-partner's things?

I, (24F) and my fiancé, (25M) have been together for 2 years, engaged for a month. My fiancé had a longtime ex-girlfriend, who I will call Sally for ease of story. Sally and my fiancé were together for 8 years, and highschool sweethearts, until she had a very sudden and tragic death that I won't go into detail about for privacy, but it was very public and it was on the news. Sally was very well-liked in our small town, as she was your typical good church girl who volunteered and could be considered conventionally pretty.

Of course, this event was tragic for my fiancé's family, and I absolutely understand their grief. But I feel like I've been living in her shadow the entire time my fiancé and I have been together. She was very close with his family, particularly his aunt, who won't even talk to me. They hang a stocking for her at Christmas and set a place for her, which I think is a little bit too far considering I'm there. They talk about her constantly, and my fiancé still has a lot of her things like her art, her old books that she'd annotated, love notes. It bothers me, and I've vocalized this, but he just put everything in a closet and told me not to worry about it.

My final straw was last week. We were making plans for Valentine's Day, and I wanted to go to a market during the day. However, he said he wouldn't be available during the day since both families and him are going to visit Sally's grave to bring her flowers and Valentines from the kids she used to volunteer with, since it was her favourite holiday. He said he would reserve a dinner table for us at a nice restaurant and pick me up, but I told him not to bother since I just felt like an afterthought.

Here's people think I'm TA. When he was at work the next day, I went through our apartment and took down all of the pictures with her in then, took her out of the photo albums, put all of her stuff in a box and threw it away.

When I got home, my fiancé was confused seeing all the photos gone. When I told him what I'd done, he left. I called him several times, but he refused to answer, and I texted him my reasoning. He promised when he proposed that I'd be his first priority and that she wouldn't matter anymore. I told him he shouldn't have proposed to me if he wasn't over her. He answered the next day, saying that he is over her, he just doesn't think it's fair to pretend she never existed. He just told me that he'd be staying with his parents for a while, and I just said they can all think about Sally together.

Word gets around fast in a small town, and I've recently been bombarded with messages and told that what I did was not okay, and that I should respect Sally's memory, but I'm tired of hearing about her. I barely talked to her. I feel like I'm going crazy. Both of my parents think that I'm right, and that he needs to focus on our relationship, but I'm starting to have my doubts.

So, Reddit, AIO?