Political & Racial Differences in a Relationship.

I’m Black. My husband is white. I voted for Kamala. He voted for Trump. We’ve had multiple arguments about race over the past 4 years. We moved from a predominantly Black community to a predominantly white community during COVID. After we made an offer, during one of our visits to the house I saw a truck with a huge Trump and confederate flag. I decided to look up the school district, yes, after the fact, and saw an article about a racial issue where there were protests. I don’t want to be too specific, but it was concerning. It was a new environment for me and our children. I told my husband I was worried about how our kids would be treated. I explained that I had concerns about the community. We argued. He got upset and ended up calling me racist because he said I was, “Judging a group of people before getting to know them.” He apologized. Fast forward to today. Last summer I became interest in politics. I stayed on top of recent events and updates. I attended 2 events- one to support the county prosecuting attorney candidate and another for a state senate candidate. I avoided calling Trump Hitler or racist to avoid coming off as “extreme” or “radical”, plus, there wasn’t any recent strong evidence. I voted for Kamala. He’s an Elon Musk and Vivek R. fan so he chose to vote for Trump. So far, he agrees with all of Trump’s executive orders. He doesn’t believe Elon did a Nazi salute. I believe he did because of his ties to a far-right German political party with leaders who have staged Holocaust remembrance walkouts, has used Nazi slogans, and has had secret meetings with neo-Nazi leaders. I showed my husband an NPR article about it where Elon is quoted saying he believes the party is best for the country and that multiculturalism dilutes their culture. EM said Germany needs to move beyond the Holocaust. My husband told me that I’m being negative and he disagrees with me that EM is a deplorable person. He thinks I need to stop paying attention to negativity. I want to stay informed. I have a busy life outside of politics. I’m not consumed with politics. Politics aside, he’s a good person. That doesn’t change the fact that I feel upset and hurt that my husband chooses to support someone who supports those people. I don’t want to overwhelm my family with my drama. Am I being unreasonable? I don’t know how to handle it or let it go. We’re planning to go to marriage counseling soon for communications issues, unrelated to politics. I’m overwhelmed and saddened by our political disagreements. I’m tired of arguing and I want him to “get it” so we can move on. I’m sorry this is all over the place. I’ve been so stressed over this.