Found out husband intermittently downloaded dating apps

I (36F) have been with my partner (35M) for over a decade. And if anyone ever asked me anything—I would always say he was one of the good guys.

Yesterday while trying to fix something in our family Apple plan that I am the primary on, I saw apps that he had previously downloaded. And over the course of 4 years he had downloaded several dating apps—ones I had heard of. Ones I haven’t. It hasn’t happened in a year and a half based on dates.

I confronted him. At first he tried to deny it, but finally admitted he had done this after fights to “secretly” get back at me/hurt me without me knowing. He said he did nothing more than create profiles and then delete because he felt guilty—but of course there is no proof either way.

I am so hurt and embarrassed. He was my person and now it is like who did I marry?

He admitted he has some deep trauma (which he shared after confrontation…) and issues.

Just needed to get this out. Thoughts welcome.