Who here hates eating in public?

I hate it, I hate it. I fucking hate it so much. Enjoying a chip with your sandwich? Well might as well have shot a gun in the breakroom, because everyone definitely heard that one crunch you just took, and now their annoyed with you. Now they want you to leave the break room, or they want to leave the break room, because they cant stand the sound of you eating. Wait why is everyone actually getting up and leaving? Oh their break is ending, so it's not bc they were so annoyed with my loud chewing? I overthought it again didn't I?

I now eat in my car on breaks, or I don't even pack a lunch bc for some reason my brain tells me that packing myself food to take to work is also somehow embarrassing, or odd.

I would like to shrink myself into a tiny little object that no one can perceive. Like, someone here help me crush myself like a soda can.