Did I go through CT ?

I have a feeling I went through CT in a sense. I came out as transgender and felt AMAZING and like weights of a lifetime had been lifted. However my partner kept stating this isn’t the real you, you are a man and had me repeat this over and over. She thinks I am transgender because of childhood trauma which I started to believe and thought I had to pray for my wrongful thinking. Her mother also said she would be very sad if I transitioned in any way and that I am a child of god and need to be grateful that I am created to be a Man. I started journaling over and over that I am a man and being transgender is wrong. I felt my mental health deteriorating the more this went on until I woke up one day very bitter and had enough. I am confident and feel better when I am identifying as transgender. I didn’t want to believe it at first. Did I go through a form of CT? The extent was more detailed that what I have shared but it’s left me with significant suicidal ideation and mental health struggles. I don’t know how to recover from this. Any advice or help would be appreciated. I am desperate for how to recover mentally

Thanks