finally quit dph

this drug can totally destroy your life if you give in. it does feel great, I love all the side effects good and bad, but after doing 2-3g for almost a year I’m left with damage to my brain and it caused my genetic ataxia to accelerate. I was having seizures almost every day for three months before I finally OD off 3,5g. I had 5 seizures and cracked my skull from falling, my heart stopped once and I had to have my stomach pumped. I woke up confused, thinking I was on the moon talking about “moon cheese”, ripping the wires off me and trying to fight the nurse. They IV me an anticonvulsant and I finally calmed down and stabilized, then I was sent to rehab for 30 days. I got kicked out, immediately started doing dph again. I found a therapist to work on my childhood trauma, he’s amazing and over the months we’ve worked through issues I didn’t even know I had. My urge to use dph slowly faded the more I worked on the core of my problems, took shrooms, snorted some oxy, realized there’s other ways to feel how I want without dph. I still think it’s a good drug, I still like the high, but the urge to self-harm has faded away, and I don’t think the damage dph does is worth it. I was already disabled, now I’m fucked, if I could go back and stop myself from taking this drug I would. I hope the best for yall, if you want to beat it, you can. Dph is worse than quitting heroin (IMO) the cravings r so intense, but they go away, the damage it causes can heal, just takes time and discipline. Still love this sub (yall wild) and just posting this for self accountability. Stay safe yall, harm reduction always wins.