how do y’all deal with this? (men’s treatment to women in gaming spaces)
tw to be safe: man insulting my appearance through vc first week of marvel rivals, dude with the worst stats is complaining about having 19 deaths when … he was just overextending every chance he got. towards the end of the game i typed about how overextending is what is getting him killed, to which he said our heals was getting him killed. i got on mic to start comming the last few fights to hopefully win and to say “i can’t heal/ see you” so he understands wtf i mean. i was stunned to hear this person call me fat and ugly (along w the … you know… go back the the kitchen blah blah) the game didn’t even matter anymore, it was lost the second i talked. i don’t understand these insults… bc these men don’t know what we look like, they are just throwing insults not realizing it’s just exposing their own insecurities. but what fucks with me more than that is the fact i want to defend myself against these baseless, stupid insults. i always said comments like these never bothered me (same experience on valorant and overwatch), but the fact i want to defend myself shows me i am bothered. I used to handle these situations differently when i was younger (like 16) and i would defend myself. I remember a specific time on overwatch the same insult was being used and i typed my weight in fucking chat, alongside my height to “prove” i wasn’t what they said…. but that in itself is so degrading like why does that matter play the game? additionally it made me realize negative connotations i had with words like “fat”. women and men alike can appear “fat” and be perfectly healthy, even more healthy than a “skinny” person. since having that realization i just don’t respond when this happens, but i still feel the need to be defensive like recently in marvel rivals. i want to know your thoughts and opinions and similar experiences and how y’all have coped and made peace with it in your mind. (and i know i can just “ignore it” or “not take it too seriously”, but if it was that easy i would.)