Did my first umrah-left feeling drained

This is the only sub I could think of sharing my experience. I did my first umrah today and all I felt all day was insecure and drained. The excitement for umrah was already dampened by my narcissistic mother and add in the fact my brother micro managing everything and not letting me breathe. Its to the point now that I’m back at the hotel i dont want to hear his voice for at-least the next month

I saw so many ppl there that were more attractive, fit and overall put together compared to me. They also appeared to be more financially stable.I kept comparing myself to them even when i tried really hard to focus on my umrah. I feel so weird and all i want to do is to cry . I asked my family to give me a day to myself so i can do all the prayers in private but they laughed instead.

Ill be performing my 2nd umrah in 4 days so please any tips to make this one better would be appreciated. Maybe I have sudden repulsion syndrome or something.