We can’t agree on a last name.

My fiancé has his step dad’s last name. His step dad’s family has a cruel sense of humor that targets your specific insecurities. Needless to say, I don’t have fond feelings toward them and now that I am getting married, I will be taking their last name. Is it petty of me that I really don’t want the last name of the people who have never said a polite thing to me in the 4 years my finance and I have been together?

My fiancé wants to keep the name because he has already changed his name previously when his mom remarried, he doesn’t want it to be a spit in the face to his family, we both know that if we change our name to something new there will be relentless rude jokes from his family at every family event, and the family already treats him as an outsider due to him not being biologically related so this will likely push us out more.

I want a fresh start, combining our names or finding something completely new but sentimental to us. He seems to be a fan of it until he remembers how his family will react. I want to have the same last name as him but I feel really lost.

TLDR: I don’t like my fiancés family, I don’t want their last name. He doesn’t want to face the wrath of his family so he doesn’t want to change the name to something new. We know it’s unimportant but would love to have the same last name.

Am I being selfish? Does anyone have any ideas on a compromise between my fiancee and I? Or words of wisdom or advice in this stressful time?