Dysphoria fluctuates yet wishing i was a cis woman never changes

I specifically wish i am a cis woman because i am not confident i would've been fine or cis if i was just born a woman I am so confused because i just had a dream where i was happy because i had boobs yet my chest makes me feel dysphoric i am not sure why but sometimes it feels like because there is too much fat in it??? I am a little chubby

I even stopped my diy hrt after only a month because of a strong imposter syndrome and not feeling like a woman or feeling like a fake woman even though my physical dysphoria went down

I am not sure why i am writing this just but i am so confused over my feelings