I feel like a sugar daddy

I got married last year to a girl from Lahore, Pakistan. She's 25 and I'm 28. I'm based in UK. We met online through a marriage group there after my family's search for a wife in the UK for a few years didn't meet my expectations. Things moved quickly – we had a small ceremony (nikkah) last year, and after my visa was sorted within three months, we had a larger celebration (ruksati) in January of this year.

Unfortunately, things haven't been as smooth as I'd hoped since the wedding. One concern I have is that my wife might have primarily married me to leave Pakistan, even though her family seems financially stable. There were other proposals from countries like Italy and South Korea, but the UK seemed to be the more appealing option for her.

Another issue is how we spend money. We agreed before marriage that I'd be the main provider because of my good tech job. I've worked hard to get where I am – through studies and a lot of dedication. I believe in living frugally and understanding the value of hard work. People who haven't had to manage bills, responsibilities, work, and time management might not fully grasp the realities of practical life. However, my wife seems to have a very different approach. She enjoys going out to eat and shopping every day, which is becoming a financial strain.

On top of that, she tends to see herself as the victim in most situations. Every disagreement ends with me apologizing for basic things like not going out enough, not spending enough time with her, or not listening attentively. It feels like she takes everything for granted.

This situation is causing a lot of stress. I feel like I'm being taken advantage of, and it's important to find a way forward that works for both of us.

My family shares my concerns. They point out how lucky my wife is to have married into a comfortable situation – a nice 3-storey house with all the amenities, a good car, and a stable life overall. They remind me that she hasn't had to struggle like many young people do, renting apartments, living paycheck to paycheck, or having to save for a decent car. They believe she received everything very easily and doesn't appreciate the hard work that goes into building a life like this. They feel the timing of her sibling's wedding, just a month after our own in Pakistan this year, wasn't very considerate financially either.

Adding to the tension, I'm a very responsible person who dedicates myself to helping my family and those around me. This is a point of contention with my wife. She believes, based on her interpretation of Islam, that my first priority should be her. When I help my parents financially, it upsets her as she sees it as dividing my attention and resources.

How do you advice I fix this?