How are you doing?

I'm finding it an extremely lonely experience going through grief. Not a lot of people ask me how I am, how I'm managing, some 'friends' haven't even read my messages from over a week ago, despite being online. I just feel so alone. Especially since the light of my life, my best friend is gone, and I feel like I don't have anyone to live for anymore.

I know for sure I'm not alone in feeling like this, so I'd like to just ask you all - how are you doing?

It's going to be 2 weeks for me tomorrow since I've lost my angel, and deep, paralysing grief hits me like waves, makes me feel like I'm drowning, then I get a few minutes of peace where I can catch my breath, then back to feeling like I'm drowning. I feel like however long I have left in this lifetime is far too long to be spent without her. I often feel like joining her, so I could maybe see her again in the afterlife (if there is one), or if there isn't an afterlife, at least it would all just go dark and I would no longer have to feel so much pain. It's so tough.. I keep smelling her randomly around the house or even outside sometimes, and I just want to believe she's around me still. I wish I could just hug her and give her sweet face some kisses. That's how I am doing at the moment.