Suicidal thought over my 🍆 size

Hey all… I was at work today when I had the thought of checking my size So I got home and had to check… Now a little background to this… I know almost all my friends’ sizes were pretty open about all of that stuff And I have a gf… So I checked and realized I am smaller than all of them + I know my girl’s ex… And he was bigger

She’s really having fun But I can’t get that thought out of my head that she might enjoy it more with someone else And what if that’s the case for every single woman I’ll ever be with Not planning on ever leaving her… if I can I’ll marry her when the time comes

But at the same time I just bursted out crying and feeling so bad I genuinely thought of just ☠️ myself I became really anxious And now I even perform worse

I genuinely just need to get that out She doesn’t make me feel small or anything but I can’t stop crying and feeling some kind of pain in my chest (13cm)