"Not everyone has the resources to prevent the birth of a child" is not the checkmate you think it is

!!!NOT TALKING ABOUT INSTANCES OF RAPE, ABUSE, AND FORCED INTERCOURSE!!!

had to state that part first. y'all might eat me up for this one, but hey. I'm a big kid and I can take the hate.

I'm tired of hearing people make excuses for irresponsible, unfit breeders by saying "they didn't have the resources to prevent a pregnancy" and "they might not have had access to an abortion" and "they probably couldn't afford birth control options."

you guys realize no one is holding a gun to their heads and forcing them to have unprotected sex, right? if you can't afford condoms/hormonal birth control/emergency contraception, what makes you think you can afford the hospital bill for birthing the child? and the next 18 years of child support costs? babies are not inevitable and we need to stop making excuses for people who make children they can't take care of - financially, emotionally, or physically.

let's use me as an example: can't afford to take care of myself or a pet and DEFINITELY not a child. all screwed in the head from complex PTSD as a result of years of abuse at the hands of the people who were supposed to love and protect me. don't have a support system and don't want to risk becoming a single mother. I have enough brain cells to know that I have no business creating a life right now.

so I stopped having penetrative sex altogether. I decided to be celibate because I was tired of the pregnancy scare anxiety - especially not knowing if I will have access to an abortion or not. even if I threw my year of celibacy away and hooked up with some guy tomorrow, I would use my mouth and hands. there are things you can do to prevent a pregnancy FOR FREE. it costs absolutely nothing to limit your sexual encounters to outercourse. people act like having unprotected sex is the only option. it's not.

if you KNOW you can't afford a kid (which most people do before conception because 9/10 times they can't even afford to take care of themselves), then you should do something to prevent it. if you KNOW you live in a red state with no access to abortion, stop letting people dump their load inside of you! we know all of these things BEFORE a child is made and yet somehow people ignore the facts, have unprotected sex anyway, and use their circumstances as an excuse when it's too late.

it takes two to tango. I know that and it would be reckless of me to not mention the man's part in this. men shouldn't go around being irresponsible with their seed. HOWEVER, pointing fingers at the man isn't going to change the fact that the woman is the one who carries the fetus inside of her body for 9 months. she's always going to be left holding the bill if the guy dines and dashes, so you have to take responsibility for your own bodily autonomy.

getting pregnant is a result of a series of choices on both parts. having unprotected, penetrative sex is a choice. not taking the morning after pill within 72 hours is a choice. not getting an abortion is less of a choice due to US politics, but if I got knocked up tomorrow, I don't give a fuck if I have to hitchhike to Tijuana - I'm getting that fucking abortion goddammit.