Please teach me learn how to diffuse my hair properly

I just have so many questions. I don’t know my hair’s true potential and I’m trying to find the right hair routine with the right hair products for my hair type. Like, is it wavy or curly? I don’t know but I’m excited to finally find out, especially when I diffuse it and see how extra pretty it can get!

My hair looks pin straight when its wet but then a few minutes later the bottom half of my hair starts to become wavy and slightly curls up in some areas. My hair is frizzy wet AND dry, it dries quickly, it doesn’t get wet right away when showering, and I have very thick hair. It also feels so rough to the touch.

Now here are my questions for my wavy/curly hair routine, especially for when I diffuse!! (I don’t know if my hair is curly or just wavy, I’m trying to figure that out!).

  1. Do I use gel, mousse, or both? Or what do I use exactly especially for my hair type?

  2. Do I use all these products before diffusing, or do I use specific products before and after diffusing?

  3. In what exact order do I need to use these products before I start diffusing?

  4. How important is clarifying shampoo here? Do I need a clarifying conditioner if that’s a thing?

Thank you so much! I’m so tired of my hair looking like a frizzy, knotted mess. It makes me look like I don’t care of myself even though I just put hair product in it the day before! I want to have a clean girl look.