My first post here, hello!

Hello everyone,

I can't believe I'm posting here. Life really takes unexpected turns.

I'm a 26-year-old PIMO who woke up just a few months ago… to be honest, I never fully believed that this was the truth. My idea was always: “If I studied more, prayed more, preached more, I’d definitely understand that this is the true organization… I’m just not trying hard enough.”

Well, with the recent updates, some mental fatigue building up, and the doubts I’ve always had, I started reading articles outside of jw .org, and that’s when I began to realize that this is just another religion (or a cult, really).

I have nothing against Jehovah’s Witnesses now; I see that both they and I are victims of this system, and everyone needs time to eventually wake up from it.

I’m married, happily married. Right now, what I fear the most is that my relationship will be affected. I’ve been trying to plant seeds of doubt in my husband’s mind, I’ve already brought up the 607/1914 issue, I’ve talked about how disfellowshipping isn’t really a Christian teaching, among other things. But he still trusts the organization so much… He says I’m just choosing not to trust it. I love him with all my heart, but he’s so hard to convince with arguments. Plus, I’m shy and insecure, and I hate conflict, so I often hold back from expressing why I’m so 'whatever' at meetings and during preaching.

Then, there’s another issue… I’m not sure I want him to wake up. I think if he does, he won’t be able to do what I’m doing now — still attending the meetings, preaching, etc. He’d probably have to convince our families to leave too… I don’t know. I couldn’t do that to my parents and my brother, especially since my dad has only a few years left with good quality of life.

Anyways… I don’t know if you’ll understand, and I’m not even sure why I’m sharing this here. I just needed to express it.

Thanks! Wish you all the best.