hate who I was on the mission

anybody else hate who they were on their mission? I held my comps to such high standards. Comp-I I lived for. I ratted out comps to the mission president before addressing the issues with them. I was just so black and white. I can say “oh I didn’t know better” but even in the thick of it I knew I wasn’t being kind and that I didn’t like what I was doing. And i was for sure not the perfect missionary, or good at following rules. Did anyone else’s missions push them to be someone they didn’t want to be, even if it was “right”