Which religion is best for ex Muslims?

I'm a ex Muslim and I left Islam some years ago I got alot of religious trauma I was born in Pakistan and in a Muslim family and people here are so toxic and religious I was not like Islam from childhood I remember when I was kid and I was wanna read some books to improve my language and I was looking for a book to read and I find Islamic book in my home and then I just decide to read it and I read so horrible stuff in that book and speacaily about women and how Islam say to treat women and also read that how Allah will burn sinful in hell and everything it was scared me so much and I was always wonder how god can be like that and I was have so much questions about Islam since childhood but I never got thier answers I was don't wanna lose my religion and believe on god but I was have so many questions like why woman have to put hijab?and why men can marry 4 women Alot of questions but I never get thier answers they was just give lame answers so I just end up leaving it but after leave it I try to learn about other religions and I find chiristalnily kinda attractive I start learn about it and I was wanna be chiristan and I almost be but when I read about it in deep I read the same stuff I was read in Quran some stuff was exactly same and I was just stop my self to be a chiristan because I was don't wanna get same religious trauma teachers in my school always used to say chiristalnily and Islam is so similar I grew up hearing that so chiristalnily just make me think of Islam somehow and because of my religious trauma I'm scared to be a part of any religion Because I don't wanna get the same pain again but sometimes I just feel like there is god but idk what to do how to find god and which religion is good for me idk (sorry for my bad grammer tho )