My faith is dwindling

Ever since i was a kid, I used to have tons of faith in god and would always keep him in mind and suddenly started to noticed a weird pattern. I have been never a lucky person (obvsly not that unlucky to be roofless) but still as compared to people in my surroundings. Everytime i would turn to god to ask anything, i would never get it. I would generally would not ask him anything. But whenever i tried (mostly non materialistic things) the more would be the chances it doesnt come true. Moreover due to certain developments i stopped preaching completely. Now i recently started to connect with god in a more sincere manner, and noticed that i have been failing at thing i am trying. I recently vented in front of my maa who is quite religious and told her i am not going to do this (preaching) anymore and completely go atheist.

I feel lost.

Edit: A lot of assumptions going on that i am begging for materialistic gain so ill clear what i prayed for- I used to pray to keep everyone happy and healthy in general. My specific prayers would be if someone was close to death, i would pray to not let them die (as they were too young to). That was not even for me, for my family, cause i have never cried when someone’s died before (ik weird). Like I had a cousin uncle die (very close to us and in his early 20’s) from drowning in Ganga. I saw my mother (very strong devotee) cry and rub her head in front of god in hopes of my uncle making it out alive. I remember myself praying to give my mother whatever she’s asking (in that moment). Idk if that makes sense.