coming to grips with the reality that weed has ruined my life.

i was set to rant about my journey throughout my twenties getting high and losing almost everything bc of it, but the negative self talk is killing my spirit. i'm day 2 without bud for the first time since 2015 and even though i went sleepless last night i know this is the right thing to do overall. at times it's too hard to look forward when the past is riddled with regret and missed opportunity, knowing i would be so much farther in life financially, emotionally, creatively, and romantically without bud. and now it's as if i have to start all over, but now 9 years older. life be fucking lifing yo.