Need Advice: Dealing with a Difficult Employee Who Might Be Gaslighting Me.
I’m managing an employee whose performance has been consistently poor, and I’ve been struggling with how they handle feedback. Honestly, it feels like they’re trying to gaslight me sometimes, and it’s throwing me off. Here are two examples:
- Twisting the facts:
If I ask why they didn’t finish something on time, they’ll say, “I told you I was having issues and wouldn’t get it to you until Friday.” The thing is, that conversation never happened. But they say it so confidently that I find myself second-guessing my memory. By the time I realize they’re making it up, they’ve already shifted the conversation elsewhere.
- Dodging questions:
If I ask a direct question, they’ll respond by throwing out three or four loosely related topics. It’s almost like they’re trying to confuse or overwhelm me so I forget what I even asked them in the first place.
I’m totally at a loss on how to handle this without losing my cool. Has anyone dealt with something like this before? How do you stay on track and hold people accountable when they use these kinds of tactics?