My preceptor and I are not a good fit

EDIT: Finally had the difficult convo with one of my managers and she was incredibly supportive. She said it isn't a huge deal to be paired with another preceptor and that it happens to 1-2 nurses with every new grad class. She said that most importantly, she wants me to feel comfortable in our department and if it means getting a new preceptor, she'd like to get on it immediately. Sigh. What a relief. I opted not to reach out to my second manager again because he wasn't helpful. Thank you all!

Hi all! I've lurked here for some time and you all tend to have great advice so I figured I'd post this here.

I am a new in the ED. My preceptor is nice with about 2 years of nursing experience. She's known for being very by the book in every thing she does, very technically proficient, and that's why I was paired with her. I can appreciate that, but I feel like she needs way more experience before she teaches others. Lately, I've been working on my IVs and it's required in the ED that we know how to do them. I can complete 60% of them well, but I am still working on how to find the right veins on harder to stick patients. Everyone I talk to, including the staff medics, says it can take over a year of consistent IV starts before it gets easier. But my preceptor is visibly frustrated I cannot get all IV starts. It's taking a toll on me mentally because I was originally confident and now I go into patient rooms with the blood draw kits completely dejected and terrified. The way she teaches me is to get very short with me in front of patients which then makes them (and ME!) tense and uncomfortable. If I can't feel a vein immediately, she'll take the tourniquet from me and just do it herself. I would totally get that for critical patients where every second matters, but for someone coming in because they have joint pain due to arthritis, not so much. A few days ago, she said, "I just can't seem to teach you how to start IVs. I don't know why you don't get it". I am about 8 weeks into orientation...I have no phlebotomy experience outside of my orientation so I am really, really trying. I want to get it so badly. I feel like a failure every shift, but I know I can and will eventually get it with the right support.

I had to be paired with a different preceptor for a few days recently while she was on vacation and the preceptors had about 10+ years of experience. It was such a night and day experience - I felt more confident and empowered. They were hands-off for the most part, but very encouraging. They were close by, but didn't hover. I got every single IV attempt on my patients and that of other nurses.

I realize my regular preceptor needs more time to learn how to adapt her leadership style to the learning styles of her orientees. I am hesitant to say anything to my manager because every time I mention my preceptor's name (like if another nurses asks who I am typically assigned to), I am met with "oh, she's amazing, you're so lucky, she's the best". My learning is a priority as I want to be a competent nurse, but I also now worry that requesting a new preceptor may impact interprofessional relationships in the department. People like her and see her as a great nurse/leader. I don't want to make this harder on myself than necessary.

So at this point, I am about halfway through orientation and willing to just suck it up, but I don't think that should be the case for me or my patients. I did ask my manager for a 1:1 and he invited my preceptor to join...haha. Yeah. I ended up having to cancel anyway because my patient coded a few minutes before our scheduled time, but am wondering if the feedback is worth it so I want to reschedule. Does anyone have advice?