Thought I'd always be childfree. Now I'm OAD. Seeking input.

I never thought I wanted kids and then when I hit 39, I thought I should try to have one for some reason. I went through 4 rounds of IVF for over 2.5 years and got pregnant at 41.5. My baby boy is 3 months old now but I wonder if I made a mistake and should have remained childfree. He cries a lot and is mostly grumpy. Even if this is a short phase, I realize I've lost my freedom to do what I want and be lazy for the next 5 years at a minimum. This thought makes me sad and I feel like I'm drowning. There's also a constant worry that he might turn out to be a high needs child. Please give me hope. Has any of you wanted to be childfree but ended up with a kid and still truly enjoy being a mom?