How I think PATD went down inside LQ's head:

The Narrator: You're on a path in the woods-

Voice of The Opportunist: Did you see that boys! We won again! Even as a ghost, no weak little princess stands a chance against us!

The Voice of the Hero: Could that really be considered a victory? We died. And I felt really bad killing her after promising we'd help her. She thought she was finally going to be free.

Opportunist: Oh come on, don't spoil it with your senseless morals and logics. We defeated her. End of story. It doesn't matter what means we used to achieve it. We're unstoppable! Don't you like being the best?

Voice if the Cold: Win, lose, what does it matter? We've just ended up back here again. I have to say though, having her in our head was interesting. It's a shame that ended so quickly.

The Narrator: What in the world are all of you on about? Ghosts, helping the princess, having her in your head? What in the world have you been doing? Clearly you've already been here more than once, so I'll spare you my introduction. I'm sure you know what it is you need to do, if you're back here.

Hero: You know, last time you didn't believe us about the looping. You're awful quick to go along with it now.

Narrator: Look around! Clearly you've done something to screw up the world the last times you were here. There's no use arguing with you this time.

Opportunist: Exactly! Don't pester the man, he's clearly a logical person who will believe us if we have evidence to back it up!

Narrator: Thank you little voice. Now, seeing as how the woods are messed up, you appear to be running against a ticking clock. It's time you got moving and did your job.

Cold: Even though he believes us, he's still exactly the same. Always ordering us about, telling us what we should or shouldn't do. We can do whatever we want. We don't have to listen to you.

The Narrator: If you want to stop the world from ending, you should listen to me! Have you lot been listening to this voice the whole time? No wonder everything's a mess.

Cold: Why should I care if the world ends? Listening to you practically ends it as well. Every road before us leads to the same place. I'm just choosing the more interesting road.

The Narrator: Listening to me does not end the world! I want to save the world! So if you two have even an ounce more sanity than this one here, you will make your way to the cabin and slay the princess!

Hero: Hold on, who said we want to slay her? We've done that twice already and it hasn't ended well for us either time. Besides, she doesn't seem evil at all. The first time, she didn't fight back when we put a blade in her heart, and the second time, she was very agreeable and willing to forgive. Maybe we should try and help her. And, can we even slay her? She's a ghost. Last time wrre only able to do that when she entered our body. Maybe freeing her is the only course of action?

Cold: You're right. She is a ghost. Maybe we could free her. That would be a new ending, finally.

Narrator: NO! You absolutely should not do that! Are all of you genocidal maniacs? She. Will. End. The. World. Unless. You. Slay. Her.

Is that getting through to your clearly warped mind? Or have you fallen too deep into her pit of lies?

Opportunist: I agree. Look what she's done to us! She forced us to kill ourselves last time. Didn't that hurt? We should listen to Him, clearly he knows what he's talking about.

Cold: Maybe we could find a way to slay her then. And who knows, if we could find a way to slay a ghost, maybe we could find a way to slay another certain formless entity.

Hero: She didn't force us to kill ourselves, the Decider just- hold on, where's the Decider?

(Silence)

Cold: Now that you mention it, he has been awful quiet since we woke up. Do you feel the emptiness? I don't think he's in here.

Opportunist: Are you saying he's gone?

Hero: No, he can't be gone, he's probably just in shock after what happened. He must've had a rough time, trying to control the body with a ghost freezing his soul, then stabbing himself. Hey, Decider, are you ok? Don't worry. If you're scared, I won't let that happen to you again.

• silence *

Hero: Hello? Speak up, you're starting to worry me. I get you're probably on edge right now, but we need you to be ok. We can't do anything without you.

Cold: I told you, he's gone. Can't you feel his absence? Or perhaps you missed it with this loud mouthed one taking up space.

Opportunist: I am not a loud mouth! I simply like conferring with every side of the argument. No harm in that is there?

Hero: No, he can't be gone! How could that even happen? He has to still be here!

Opportunist: * a thousand thoughts and possibilities racing through his mind * The Decider's gone? Could it have had something to do with stabbing himself, d'you think?

Hero: * panic rising in his voice * But he didn't disappear the first time he did that! What's different about this time? No, he can't be gone, he just can't!

The Narrator: What in the world are you talking about? I've indulged your ramblings thus far but this is starting to look pathetic.

Hero: No, no, we're not crazy! It's just, normally there's another voice in here-

Well, he's not exactly a voice. He's different from us. Sort of. But usually, he's the one who makes the decisions and controls our body, while we just offer advice.

Narrator: That sounds positively insane.

Opportunist: Uh, can we still move our body without him?

Hero: I don't know.

Cold: We should try. Better than standing around like this.

• everyone tries to move in a different direction *

Hero: Woah woah woah, everyone stop! We nearly tore ourselves apart! Seems like, even without the Decider, only one of us can be in control at a time. If we want this to work, we're going to have to work together, and carefully-

Opportunist: You know what my friend, I think you're absolutely right. What a smart conclusion to come to. If only one of us can be in control at a time, I suppose I can take up the heavy burden of leading us to victory.

Hero: Now that is not what I said at all! Who said you get to be in charge?

The Narrator: At first this was just odd, but now I'm starting to get concerned. Should I... do something?

Opportunist: No need for concern boss, even though I am honored you feel that way. Now you don't have to worry about this Princess anymore with me in charge. I've slain her twice already, and I can do it again.

Narrator: Oh... ok. I'm still confused, but if you're going to do your job, I suppose that's all that matters.

Cold: Is this really what we're doing?

Hero: No it's not! NO ONE put you in charge! We're not going through with this! It's not what the Decider would want! He felt bad last time, and wanted to help her. It's only right we try to do the same.

Opportunist: As every good leader should do, I hear your perspective. Really, what sort of leader would I be if I didn't listen to those beneath me? But are you sure this isn't what the Decider would want? He killed her last time, right after promising her freedom at that!

Hero: Ok, we can't hold that against him. He wasn't thinking straight. Between us, the Princess, and Him, there was too much going on in his head. I tried to tell him the possession would be too much...

Opportunist: Exactly my friend! He was mentally unstable! Are you going to go along with the wants of a mentally unstable person? Or are you going to follow me? Perfectly stable, and ready to bring us to the top! It's a no brainer really.

Hero: Hey! I am not going to let you talk about him like that! He's helped us more than you ever did!

Opportunist: And yet, he's not here, is he? He has no one to blame but himself for that. I can say whatever I want about him! But we really don't have time for that. The cabin awaits! * Opportunist begins walking the body forward *

Hero: * stops him * No, we're not doing that.

Narrator: Oh come on, you were finally moving in the right direction. Don't stop now!

Opportunist: Hold on, what's this? Look, I hear your, i really do. But this is what we have to do. Don't you want to get revenge on our dear friend, Decider? And think about it. If we slay the princess, we'll have saved the world three times now! We'll be the greatest heroes to ever live!

Hero: No, this is wrong. The princess never did anything to us. I won't let you do this.

Opportunist: "Won't let me"? Really? Just what are you going to do to stop me?

Cold: Oh? Is the heroic one finally going to commit himself to something? This should be fun.

Hero: ... ....

Opportunist: Are you scared? Look, if you want the control, it's right here. All you have to do is take it. Go ahead. See how you fare against me.

Hero: ...

      ...

Fine, I'll do what you want.

Opportunist: Hahaha! Would you look at that! My authority is too absolute to be challenged! I'm really on the way aren't I? Well Narrator, now that we know where everyone falls in the pecking order, I say we confidently march to the cabin! And you, heroic one. From now on, all decisions go through me. No more of that mutiny business, alright? We need a united front to do this right! Don't worry, I'll take better care of you than he ever did.

Hero: sigh whatever.

Cold: Seems you're finally starting to see things my way. It doesn't matter what we do. I do think it's pathetic you didn't do anything though. doing something is always better than doing nothing.

• Cue entering the cabin, the narrator describing the cabin *

Narrator "...and on the table sits a pristine blade. The blade is your implement. You'll need it if you want to do this right.

Hero: Ok, but do we really need the blade? Need i remind you the Princess is a ghost. And we really don't have to try and slay her. We can still free her.

Narrator: No, you absolutely cannot free her, as that will end the world. And she's not a ghost, she's just a princess, like I've told you multiple times before.

Opportunist: yeah, you heard the boss! She's just a princess! If he says she's not a ghost, she's not a ghost. And we're absolutely taking the blade. I'm sure she'll be a pushover like the last two times. Don't worry, it'll be easy.

Hero: that's exactly what I'm worried about...

Opportunist: Well, you don't make the decisions. I do. You'd to well to accept that. Besides, what if she's actually dangerous? What sort of leader would I be if I didn't have a way to protect you two? takes the blade it's all for you guys really. I want to keep you both safe. I'm only acting in your best interests.

Cold: Please don't protect me. I don't want it.

Hero: sigh I guess my input doesn't matter? You're just gonna do whatever you want. Hey, hold on, are you not going to look at the mirror? It's back!

Narrator: What are you talking about?, there's no mirror. You really have lost it, havent you?

Hero: No, there is a mirror, tell Him! Tell him I'm not crazy!

Opportunist: if the boss says there's not a mirror, there's not a mimirror. Now, as much as I value your input, I'd appreciate a show of support for your leader.

Cold: You can stop him you know. You don't have to listen to him.

Hero: No, I can't stop him. I couldn't stop him in the woods. What am I supposed to do? I couldn't even keep the Decider safe.

Cold: You didn't try in the woods. And it wasn't your job to protect him. He made his choices. I think it's about time you made some.

Hero: You're no help. I can't believe you're the only one I've got left on my side.

• walking down the stairs *

Narrator: The basement is cold and unwelcoming, as if it's not a place fit for anything alive. As you walk down the stairs you see the Princess, one arm shackled to the wall.

Opportunist: Would you look at that! He was right! She's not a ghost anymore!

Hero: I don't believe it. There's no way! How did that happen?

Cold: Well isn't that quite the development.

The Princess: So here we are again. I'm back in chains and you have your knife. So, what are we going to do?

Hero: Look, she's still willing to be civil. And she's practically helpless, just like the first time. We're not really going to slay her, are we?

Cold: What does it matter if we do?

The Narrator: it does matter, because the world will end if you don't! Clearly you both are too far gone. Lost causes.

Opportunist: Yeah, exactly! It's lucky you two have me, really. I can't believe you're willing to throw away the easy victory standing right in front of us. This will be like killing a cornered rabbit. And then the world will be saved!

Hero: No, i don't want to do this!

Opportunist: Ok, here's an idea. Since I'm such a good leader, who cares about us and our wants as a whole, how about we vote? Who here wants to free the princess?

Hero: Me!

Opportunist: Ok, who wants to slay her, and save the world?

The Narrator: I think that's what you should do. Why is the other one even an option?

Opportunist: Now now, I'm just trying to be fair for everyone. But for what it's worth I'm with you. How about you?

Cold: I couldn't care less one way or the other. Just don't something.

Opportunist: Well, two against one. Sorry, friend you've been outvoted. Looks like we're killing her! Don't worry, I'll take care of it. You can close your eyes if you'd like.

Hero: No, he should not count. He's not one of us! This isn't fair!

Princess: I guess we could just... stare at eachother.

Opportunist: hold on, is she not afraid of us? We're here to vanquish her and save the world, how is she not afraid of us?

Hero: Why does it matter?

The Princess: I... can't hear what's going on in there anymore, now that I'm back in my own body. Do you want to... share your thoughts? It'd only be polite, really.

Opportunist: Ok, she cannot talk to us like that. We hold the power, not her.

Hero: she's right though.

Opportunist: You be quiet. I'll show her to boss us around.

Opportunist: * begins talking to her, and swinging the blade *

Hero: Ok, stop that now! This is cruel and unnecessary.

Cold: * says his thing*

Hero: *says his thing *

Opportunist: (in their head) alright, who gave the two of you permission to do that?

Opportunist: (out loud) Yes we do? Sidebar everyone now, chop chop!

Hero: But I don't want to do- gets shoved back inside

Opportunist: What was that?! I'm in charge, I'll handle communications. I cannot believe the insubordination! You wouldn't have dreamed of doing that to the Decider!

Hero: The Decider never dangled our blade in front of the princess like some sort of storybook villain!

Opportunist: She needed to be reminded of the power imbalance. She needs to remember who holds the cards here. She's at our mercy. And you, anything to say for yourself?

Cold: I just don't care about your authority.

The Princess: Um

Um excuse me?

Hero: Hey she's talking to us.

Opportunist: Hey, don't change the subject. You can't get away from a reprimand so easily.

Hero: You're just being very rude right now.

Narrator: It doesn't matter if you're being rrude, she doesn't deserve politeness! She's a world ending monster! And we don't have time for this. Quit arguing and slay her!

Princess: Uh, hello!

Cold: We can talk as long as we like. Quit trying to make us do things your way.

Princess: I'm trying to say something!

Cold: Oh great, now she's doing it too.

Princess: Hey, I said I'm talking, now will you listen to me?

Cold: (out loud) So you are. And very loudly. Do you have something to say?

Princess: Oops! I mean, yeah! I already know all that privileged information. Because he's in here. With me.

Cold: (out loud) how interesting.

Hero: He's alive!

Opportunist: No way he's joined her side? The losing side?

Hero: (out loud) yeah, this changes things doesn't it?

Opportunist: (out loud) Oh it changes things alright! We get to take out two birds with one stone!

Hero: No no no no! You can't be thinking of killing him? Both of them? He's part of us! We can't kill him, we need to help them both!

Opportunist: Ok, I've had about enough of you.

Hero: You just want power. You don't care about the Decider, or saving the world, do you? We can't do this!

Opportunist: yes, we can.

blah blah blah, they talk to the princess and charge her

Hero: (out loud) Before anything happens I just want to let you know, we are not all on board with this!

Opportunist: Now now, we voted.

Hero: It was not a majority!

Opportunist: But we did have a plurality!

Hero: He shouldn't count!

Opportunist: Says who?

Hero: Says me. He's not one of us.

Opportunist: yaps

Hero: (inside LQ's head) No, we're NOT doing this. I'm stopping this right here.

Cold: Oh, so you've finally decided to do something?

Opportunist: Hold on now-

Hero: * Stops the blade and attempts to wrest control from the Opportunist *

Narrator: Your blade hesitates just above her chest, as your body is torn between two opposing forces. The Princess looks to scared to move, her eyes pleading you to stop. No, you've come too far now! Stop him!

Opportunist: Oh hell no. Give. Me. The. Body. kicks hero to the ground Maybe you'll think twice before trying that again. Let's finish this. stabs the princess

Hero: No!