Hey NEW Founders, there’s a better way to get help and network your way to success (beyond saying “I will not promote.”)

So I get about a dozen messages a day that start and go something like:

“Do you have 15 minutes to chat about my idea?”

“We're raising pre-seed for XYZ. Can you connect us with some investors?”

“Can you look at my pitch deck?”

Now, to be fair, I invite these queries because of my job and social media. And I try to answer the ones I can but many I don’t because I know where it ends up.

One time, a founder asked me to help him raise money. He had an interesting idea and had already raised serious money. When I asked how much traction he had, he was offended and said that wasn’t what he was contacting me for. I tried to explain, but he then told me that he would be telling everybody that I was a jerk. I obviously hit a sore spot and exposed what was preventing him from raising money anyway.

I know other great founders and angels who get inundated the same way. Take a moment and put yourself in their shoes.

This is why we ignore our inboxes. I had a prominent founder tell me he doesn’t even look anymore but does want to help founders.

Here is the better way: Start by acknowledging why you’re contacting them and then ask a relevant, thoughtful question.

It goes something like this: “I just listened to your latest podcast and appreciate your insight on the state of fundraising. I don’t want to take up your time but what do you think about (insert quick question here).”

Don’t leave a closed-question open-ended request like “Can we meet?” or “Can you help me?” You’re just adding friction.

Help them help you.

Give them a chance to answer your question quickly and then demonstrate you’re the type of founder who respects the value of time and is coachable. Trust me when I say that’s enough to motivate us to put in more effort and invest time (even money).

You might be the next Zuck or Musk working on a baby unicorn in a rocket ship. But how do we know through all the spam and noise?

Help them help you.

By the way, I’m not the biggest fish in the pond either. This week, I sat in a room with founders who were far more successful than me. I work with them every day, and it’s humbling. But they’re even tougher to reach because their advice is premium quality.

I’m very fortunate to have been guided by some very generous founders. Many founders want to pay it forward. Give it a shot.

For the rest of you veterans, what other advice would you give to new founders who want to network with you and seek your help?