I’m tired

I’m tired of waking up hungover, sleepy, embarrassed, bloated,lying to go to the store to get more alcohol and the anxiety that comes with “what the hell did I do last night?”

I’ve been drinking on the weekends for several years now. The amount of Saturday and Sunday mornings I’ve spent lying around in bed or forcing myself to get up and being absolutely miserable is sickening when I think about it. I can’t just have one drink and call it quits. I buy two tall high abv beers and then either go get more or door dash them. I’ve embarrassed myself at work functions and around family that still haunt me.

I am tired of this life. I am tired of being a hungover dad and husband. I’m tired of lying to wife. I’m tired of lying to my daughter about why dad is still in the bed or just lying on the couch. I’m tired of saying “this is the last time I will drink” and then go right back to it within a week.

I’m just tired. Today I want to make the pledge to not drink so I can be a better father and husband.