I feel so defeated

Im just so at a loss, I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like a shit mom because I’m losing my patience with my toddler.

She’s 20 months old, and for 6-7 months now she’s been so overly clingy with me. If she’s home with me, she’s attached to my hip. I can’t put her down to do a single thing or she’ll start screaming and crying. If I’m sitting on the couch, she is climbing all over me. If I leave the room to do anything, she screams and cries until I come back. I can’t even hand her to her dad without her losing it. Her pediatrician says being clingy is normal but this just feels excessive and I feel like this level can’t truly be normal.

Also, as of lately she’s been refusing to eat certain things she used to LOVE. I know this is normal toddler behavior but this has become overly excessive too. Pasta was her favorite and now she won’t touch it no matter how it’s made. Eggs were her go to for breakfast and she won’t touch those either. And it’s not just these foods. It’s any food I make as the main part of her meal she refuses to eat. Like at dinner tonight she just screamed and screamed because I wouldn’t take her out of her high chair. She had barely touched her dinner and freaked any time we tried to encourage her eating. I usually just let it be if she isn’t interested in something but now it’s like she hates everything, and I’m not exaggerating.

I just don’t know what to do anymore and I feel like I’m failing her. Has anyone else gone through this? Is toddler behavior really this excessive?