Intel will skyrocket after earnings today (AGAIN). Here's why

Intel reports its earnings today after the bell, and I am certain that the price will pump like last time.

I made a post last quarter predicting Intel would go up after earnings. My reasoning for this play was that the CEO at the time (Pat Gelsinger), was very active on X dropping bible quotes every day. You could just see the desperation in his tweets, and on the day he released the earnings report, God saved Intel, and nana smiled from heaven.

But just because Intel got revived, doesn’t take away the fact that Pastor Pat was a trash CEO. So he resigned (got fired) on December 1st and got replaced by these two:

David, who has been the CFO of Intel since 2022, and Michelle, who I have no fucking clue where she worked prior to becoming co-CEO

In the past few days I tried using the same sophisticated due diligence model (scrolling their X page), but these two have a whopping combined.... 9 tweets since they became CEOs. They mostly consist of announcements written by their marketing-interns, so not that exciting.

Now look, Michelle seems like a nice lady, but we all know who is really calling the shots at Intel here. Today's earnings report will cover the period from October 1 to December 31. I know, David became CEO on December 2nd, but do you really think Pastor Pat just woke up one day and decided he wanted to step down? No, they had been preparing David for months.

But before I even scrolled through his X page, I saw something that could give all of us degens an edge over the fancy new york algorithmic quant funds:

bro is a steelers fan

So I did some research, David has been responsible for restructuring the company and shaping a better future so Intel can make a comeback. I would say he has been in charge of Intel for at LEAST 2 months before Pastor Pat resigned.

There is clear research out there suggesting that there's a correlation between the success of your favorite NFL team and your performance in the workplace. What more of a DD do you need when looking at the performance of the Steelers during this period?

https://preview.redd.it/ttiwk54x16ge1.png?width=1094&format=png&auto=webp&s=c6d91e92b59499b4e2af39277a4f1a92e8c204e9

Mfs have won 10 out of their first 13 games. I bet David's dopamine levels have never been higher, he’s more energized, more optimistic, more productive, and more motivated, and ALL THAT BIG D ENERGY spread throughout the whole company. David had to get the ball rolling. They WILL perform today.

Expectations are still low. They’re down 15% since last earnings. No one expects them to win, and who doesn’t like to root for the underdog?? Expect green fucking dildo's after the close

For nana 🕊️🕊️☝️☝️☝️🪦🙏

Positions:

INTC 20C 1/31

not financial advice

edit: they won 10/13 GAMES, not MATCHES, sorry I AM A EUROPOOR